ElCap Report 5/17/09

Elcap Report 5/17/09
By Tom Evans
Yo.. Well it was hot today, as advertised, but that didn’t seem to deter the serious climbers from giving it a go on the Captain.  They, of course, are all volunteers, and theirs is a journey who’s conclusion is uncertain.  Improvements in the weather are just a couple of days away so be ready when the heat breaks.
Today’s ECR is brought to you by one Scott Stowe, guide extraordinaire, last seen climbing toward Dolt Tower in the blinding glare and heat, client Michael in tow.  Lori brought the girls down to see their dad hauling the freight and they got to see him close up through the telescope. 
So turn off the ball game, finish that last cheese burger, swill down the dregs of that beer and settle in to read today’s ElCap Report written just for you, Pukes of all kinds….. Here it is….

ElCap Report 5/16/09

ElCap Report 5/16/09
By Tom Evans
Yo… Pretty freakin hot today in the Ditch.  As a result of the heat there were not many takers stepping up on the Big Stone.  You may have noticed in recent days the pictures were not as sharp as the ones from the Fall.  The sun is very high in the sky now and most of the light is not reflected back to my camera and the view is kind of stark.  Also, the air is hazy with water vapor from the falls and pollen from the pines.  Plus… who dresses these pukes anyway?!!  Fall is the time to shoot ElCap but what the hell… I am here anyway because my band of followers, that’s you guys, would not make it to fall without  the ElCap Report.  So here I am suffering in silence as I always do!

ElCap Report 5/15/09

ElCap Report 5/15/09
By Tom Evans

Yo… man was it hot today, and they say it will get hotter by the weekend.  So if you can stand the heat then put a few cold ones in your pack, tell your loved one that you have important business on the internet, close the door and step into my world here at the world’s most famous and influential Bridge.  Even though the Bridge is closed until late next week for repaving, I was still there, at the west end in the blazing sun, to shoot pics and inform the woefully ignorant Tourons about how those ropes got up there so the climbers could climb up them.  Today was the first day of the YCA’s new program, “Ask a climber”.  I happen to be the man with the answers to all questions, good or bad ones included.  I devote two hours a day to set up the telescope and have equipment out so that the Tourons can really understand what is going on up there on the Captain.  It seems like I have been doing that for many years in the past but 8 hours a day!

El Cap Report 05/14/09

ElCap Report 5/14/09

 By Tom Evans

Yo.. Well here we are at last… your man is finally here on the scene! Nice, warm day here in the Valley. Must have been pretty hot up on the Cap today! The usual routes were getting the action today with most of it on the Nose as you could have guessed. So Cubicle Pukes, put down any “real” work you are doing and act busy but by all means come along with me to the fabled El Capitan, where the bailers bailed and the senders sent. Today’s ElCap Report is here right now.

El Cap Report 10/27/08

ElCap Report 10/27/08
by Tom Evans

Yo... well... the day has come folks. I drove down to the Cap today, climbed out of the van, looked and looked and saw an almost empty wall. The monkey's in my posse and I decided we needed some meadow time and with so little action to shoot I decided that the time had come to close up operations for the season and take a few days to hang with my friends and get some of the last rays of Fall color on my sensor. I didn't take a single photo today but from the meadow we tracked a couple of parties throughout the day so I do have information on them ...but there are no pics.

El Cap Report 10/26/08

ElCap Report 10/26/08

By Tom Evans

Yo... It is getting late in the season folks so get it together and bring it here. The routes are still open and the weather looks good. This weekend was splendid and many people turned out to see the end of fall. The leaves are falling rapidly but the Indian Summer continues. There are still a precious few days left to enjoy before the winds blow heavy and the cold days settle on the land.

El Cap Report 10/25/08

ElCap Report 10/25/08

 By Tom Evans

Yo... so.. yeah... I know, it was tough wasn't it? No report yesterday and you were starting to get the DT's right?! Well maybe you will start to appreciate me a little more and bump these great reports along like they deserve. Do you know that I have posted over 600 photos on the Report this year? 600!!  Now you can go to the pitiful number of photos from the other photographers in the photo collection on the Supertopo site. What do you get? 15 or 20 shots... Ha ... that's such a punk amount. And too soon I will be gone for the season and you will have to endure the long, cold, winter without your ElCap Reports to keep your heart warm... God I feel sorry for you Cubicle Pukes out there in the World. So today's report is brought to you by me... ElCap-pics, over worked and under appreciated. So evacuate the building, turn off that cell phone, and pay attention Pukes because there won't be many more of these reports as I am getting old and feeble and will too soon be just a memory...

El Cap Report 10/23/08

ElCap Report 10/23/08 By Tom Evans

 Yo... Geeze, what can I say that I haven't said in the past several reports? Totally beautiful here and the weather is cooperating to the max. Still lots of climbs to be done before the first winter storm sends the Wall Rats scurrying for warmer environs. Today's report is brought to you by the Bridge Rats with whom I am going to climb the Royal Arches tomorrow.  I will be gone most of the day. Thus there will be no photos and no ECR tomorrow... I know, I know.... Take the pain pukes!!! I need to have some fun you know!!

El Cap Report 10/22/08

ElCap Report 10/22/08

By Tom Evans

Yo.. So nice here today... a little on the warm side too. The Nose, Salathe, and Zodiac are loading up. The fall colors are absolutely stunning and I think this is the max day so far and maybe for the entire Fall. Today's report is brought to you by the Trees. Yep, those pesky rascals, trees... they make the Fall, Fall. Right now they are the commanding life form in the Valley. People are coming in from all over the place just to look at them. A lot more than come to see the climbers or to climb themselves. So here is to you my dear friends, the Trees... always be here, always shelter us, always inspire us, always remind us what we don't want to be reincarnated as!

El Cap Report 10/21/08

ElCap Report 10/21/08

By Tom Evans

Yo... I will let the photos speak for themselves today and not admonish you for not being here. The weather looks solid for at least a week and the climbers are responding by going up on the big stone. Today's report is brought to you by El Capitan. The rock we love to love. While religious leaders may claim to speak to and for God, I DO speak to and for ElCap. He tells me that he is getting pretty fed up with all the human excretions on his sides. He is also unhappy about having excess holes punched into him. He wants us to show a little more R.E.S.P.E.C.T. and not use him to do foolish things to ourselves and our fellow humans. The Captain is pro-climbing and wants only the best for us but wants us to want only the best for him too. So thanks to our Captain for all he allows us to do...

El Cap Report 10/20/08

ElCap Report 10/20/08

By Tom Evans

Yo... Oh Man, another killer day here in the valley of adventure! More climbers are making the right decision and getting on the big stone. Nose is still practically empty with only one party above Sickle. Today's report is brought to you by Aaron (KFC) Jones who, as my partner today, dragged me up a couple of climbs at the Pile. Thanks Aaron for being a good friend and a great climbing partner. So, sell the house, divorce the spouse, click the mouse and come with me to the Cap on a great fall day to see all the action up close and personal.

El Cap Report 10/19/08

ElCap Report 10/19/08 By Tom Evans

 Yo... Man was it the best day of the season or what? Perfectamoondo pukes!! As a result the rock was nearly empty!! Does that make sense? It doesn't to me. Anyway the weather looks solid for the rest of the week so don't head for Josh, or Bishop, or Red Rocks. Stay here!!!!!!!

Today's report is brought to you by the ElCap Bear and her cub who swam across the river right in front of the bridge crew this morning!

El Cap Report 10/18/08

ElCap Report 10/18/08

by Tom Evans

Yo... It started out cloudy and a little threatening but it soon became apparent that the weather was going to hold just fine. In fact it was perfect for wall climbing. Unfortunately the cliff was pretty empty, as here in Yosemite, the very mention of rain sends the monkeys scurrying for their cages! So there isn't a lot to report on. Today's report is brought to you by Bob and Ryan, who are just down from their ascent of Zodiac and spent the day basking in the glory here at the bridge.

El Cap Report 10/17/08

ElCap Report 10/17/08

By Tom Evans

Yo... well it is nice here but a bit on the hazy side. The rock is pretty empty. I have some stuff to do so this will be short and to the point. Today's Report..

El Cap Report 10/16/08

Yo.. Another super duper day here. Perfect temps to climb in the Valley but maybe just a tad warm on the Great Stone. The fire to the west is still making shooting difficult but far from impossible. The Nose was pretty crowded today and the Salathe saw some action. The rest of the routes are just sitting there waiting for you to show up!! Today's report is brought to by YOU, the climbers who want to be here so badly but, for the most part, have other obligations. YOU are the reason for the Report I do each day. I want YOU to be inspired and motivated to get out here and get in some ElCap time. ElCap had sort of fallen into the back waters of climbing in recent years and I wanted to renew interest in it in the community at large. So I have tried to connect with YOU directly. YOU have responded and I hope YOU can get the full benefits that the ElCap experience can provide. So, sell the car, get a ticket to the Valley, fill the haul bags and get on the route of YOUR dreams. I promise YOU some killer shots that YOU will remember for a lifetime.

El Cap Report 10/15/08

ElCap Report 10/15/08 By Tom Evans

Yo... Another sweet day here! Perfect weather that is to continue for some time. The Nose is getting some workout as is Zodiac. So most of the shots you will see in this report will be from these routes. Unfortunately there is some kind of a controlled burn going on out to the west which is bringing in some smoke and making the skies a bit on the hazy side. Today's report is brought to you by the State of Montana, who's sons and daughters have brought you some good climbing on the big stone these past several days. So take in the slack, tie your pard off short, step out on the run-out lead because you are protected by destiny!!

El Cap Report 10/14/08

ElCap Report 10/14/08

By Tom Evans

Yo.. Whoa, what a beautiful day here in the Ditch. The temperature was perfect as witnessed by the teams on the wall wearing light shirts most of the day. There is room on any route you want to climb. The normally full ones are very empty at the moment. Today's report is brought to you by Narek, aka Regan, who made it down from the Shield just in time to have breakfast in the Cafe and leave for home two hours later! He says his big mistake was not listening to advice form us locals not to haul his kit up the Free blast! So he paid the price by losing 3 days on that god forsaken slab. You know, I get a headache from being right all the time and I sure wish people would just listen for a change. Right, Jay and Jeanette? So chill the drinks, break out the chips, lock the door and settle down pukes, because I am not going through this again. I am throwing it down right now...

El Cap Report 10/13/08

ElCap Report 10/13/08

 By Tom Evans

Yo.. Well now... yeah it was very nice here. Light winds, warm sunlight, comfortable conditions, even in the shade. The Wall is pretty empty so with this spell of good weather forecast, this might be the time to come on down!! The speed record is in the books and the photographers are heading out. Today's Report is brought to you by the personable and talented Eric Perlman who was here for the speed run on the Nose and will soon depart. I have always found him to be friendly and generous to a fault. Thanks Eric for being an important part of our climbing community.

El Cap Report 10/12/08

ElCap Report 10/12/08 By Tom Evans Yo... It was a nice day here until afternoon when the wind picked up and it seemed much colder. The morning was nice enough and with crowd in the meadow watching the Hans and Yuji show were quite comfortable. They started later in the day so had the sun on them for the entire ascent. I heard that Steve Roper was in the crowd but never actually saw him. Steve was one of the original speed climbing guys and I remember him stating that if you could just nail a pin a minute then you could do the Nose in a day.

El Cap Report 10/11/08

ElCap Report 10/11/08

By Tom Evans

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